onlyemma's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bestefar
Bestefar died on December 9th. If I'm honest, I'm not 100% sure what happened. He had been in hospital for a few weeks, I think it was about his heart, but it wasn't serious. Dad phoned me up in the evening of the 9th and told me he'd died. It shocked us all. Not just because he wasn't meant to be that ill, but also because we all felt like he'd live forever. The funeral was on the 21st. All our Norwegian side of the family came to our house and it was actually nice because our whole family were in the same room and many of us hadn't seen eachother for years. The morning of the funeral, Dad, Kate, Auntie Karen and I, went to see Bestefar in the Chapel of rest. When I went in, I felt funny and couldn't look in the coffin. I just stared at the wall but I could see the reflection of Bestefar in the light switch. Eventually I took a deep breath and walked over to the coffin and I didn't know what to do. Bestefar looked small and pale, but he still looked like himself. Nanna didn't look like Nanna when we saw her. I felt bad, and I don't know if it was because Bestefar was in the same room, or that the coffin looked the same, but being there reminded me of when I went to see Nanna. When I saw Nanna I could hardly stand up, I couldn't believe that she was lying in a coffin and had actually gone. With Bestefar, it was easier to cope with and I hate myself for feeling like that. My relationship with Bestefar was so different to what I had with Nanna and Grandad though, so it's natural that I feel different about his death. I still loved him though. And I'm sure he loved me too, but he showed it in a different, less interested way. 1:16 p.m. - 2005-01-22 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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